Topic

Jealousy, Compersion and Emotions

Jealousy is normal, including in Ethical Non-Monogamy. Here is how to understand it, work with it, and make more room for compersion.

Feeling jealous doesn’t mean non-monogamy is wrong for you. Jealousy is a common human emotion, and it often points to a need, a fear or an insecurity worth understanding. Compersion, the joy you can feel when a partner is happy with someone else, can grow alongside it.

These guides look at the different kinds of jealousy, how attachment styles shape our reactions, the intensity of new relationship energy, and how to look after yourself when emotions run high. They are educational, not a substitute for support from a qualified professional.

Start with these

How to Overcome Jealousy

Where jealousy comes from and practical ways to work with it.

Compersion in ENM

What compersion is and how it can develop over time.

How Many Types of Jealousy Are There in ENM?

Naming the feeling helps you respond to it.

Attachment Theory and ENM Relationships

How attachment styles shape non-monogamous relationships.

Practical tools for this topic

Reading helps you understand. These tools help you put it into practice. Each one is a printable, self-paced PDF you can work through on your own or with your partners, written specifically for Ethical Non-Monogamy.

ENM Living · JournalCompersion Cultivation JournalJournal · PDFCompersion Cultivation JournalMove from jealousy towards joy, one prompt at a time.Guided journal prompts to understand what sits underneath jealousy and insecurity, and to grow compersion at your own pace, without forcing it.Understand your triggers with compassionBuild emotional generosity over timePrivate and self-pacedSee the journal ENM Living · WorksheetAttachment Style ReflectionWorksheet · PDFAttachment Style Reflection WorksheetUnderstand why some moments hit so hard.Reflect on how your attachment style shows up in non-monogamy, from waiting for a text back to pulling away when things get intense, and learn what helps you feel secure.Recognise your patternsFind what reassures youBuild more secure connectionsSee the worksheet ENM Living · AssessmentEmotional Needs AssessmentAssessment · PDFEmotional Needs AssessmentGet clear on what you actually need.Explore your emotional needs, spot areas for growth and find the words to share them with partners, so needs are met by design, not by luck.Name needs you may not have voicedSee where your relationships support youStart better conversations with partnersSee the assessment

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